Thursday, April 28, 2016

When is it time to leave your current job?

The past one week has been nothing short of frustrating, exasperating and demoralizing. It's got to do with the accursed four-letter word: W.O.R.K. 

I've been stuck in a rut for the longest time and taking on my current role wasn't exactly the way out of the rut; in fact, it might just get me more deeply entrenched. I've also felt that this is not the role or the people that I want to work in or with, and this feeling became really strong over the past one week. 

As you can probably tell, I'm at a decision crossroads -- should I stay or should I leave? Well, to help clarify my thoughts, I've decided to just write down the reasons for why I should leave, and for that matter, why this would matter to anyone else who is in a similar quandary. 

1. The markets you're responsible for. If the markets you handle are not top of the company's business plans, then it's probably a sign of your importance (or lack thereof). Staying on can only mean limited budget, limited opportunities and limited prospects. Why would you want to be the one to manage markets that the company doesn't quite value? 

2. Budget. Ah, yes. I have a decent budget of about 40K the past financial year; this year, my budget was dramatically slashed to a quarter of what I had last year. When I shared this with a colleague, her response was, "Wow, is this a way the company is telling you to go without firing you?". Wise observation indeed. Yes, if your budget has been cut while others are getting more, then it's crystal clear that what you do isn't quite important, if it's even important in the first place. 

3. Manager. I've read an article before that says, "Good people don't leave companies; they leave managers." Spot-on. My manager isn't supportive of me. He got promoted though he didn't have the leadership skills to effectively manage, lead and inspire a team. While he doesn't micro-manage (which would have made the job unbearable!), he was too ready to acquiesce to others while pushing his team to do more, and more, even to the extent of taking on some other people's work. If your manager is making life more difficult for you, then you'd do better to leave and hope that your next manager is truly the dream manager. No point hanging around hoping that your manager will change. Dream on -- it ain't happening. 

4. Prospects. So look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself -- if you're let go today, would companies out there be looking to quickly bring you onboard? If you hesitated for a second, the answer probably is no. C'mon, if you're in high demand, you'd be poached. The fact that you need to think means that you prolly haven't had any recruiters reach out to you. You need to fix this pronto. 

5. Salary. Again, look at how much you're compensated for your time. Your time is by far the single most valuable asset you have (other than health and family). If the company devalues your worth by paying you a low salary, you probably should elsewhere where you can command a higher salary. Also, your compensation package is indicative of your market value and of the importance the company places on your role -- a poor package means you're really not that important to them; an attractive compensation scheme means you're an asset, a prized possession that they are willing to pay a fair amount of money for. Fix it if your salary is lower than what you should be getting. 

6. Liabilities. You may be dithering and wondering to yourself, "okay, this job ain't that bad but I'm not quite a fan of it". In this case, you might want to holistically review your financial status. Do you have any outstanding financial obligations e.g. a school debt or housing loan? Well if you're like me who has a mountain of debts to repay, then good luck staying put with a company that doesn't pay you well. Freedom is priceless and the longer you take to repay your debt, the more in interest you pay (the principle of interest compounding!) and the lesser you will have in future to invest and save. So don't linger on, thinking that all is fine. Fast forward your life by 60 years to retirement and you will wake up in shock knowing that you actually do need to get a better paying job. 

7. Your role. I took on a role for which I didn't think highly of for the reason that it's a role that is so fluffy, which an impact that's tough to accurately and effectively quantify. As the company grows and  when performance review time comes around, the question of how much you have done will inevitably surface. So think about your role. Are you in a role for which the company truly values and for which you can really build a strong, quantitative business case for? If you don't think it is, re-examine your role again in the context of the company. Can this company do without your role? If the answer is yes, then you're at risk of being just another face in the crowd, or worse, a dispensable that the company is going to jettison when bad times come around. 

Personally, I checked off the above list (and it's really depressing). But I just want to put it out there for someone else who might be in need of a decision framework to evaluate their options. 

Good luck and may tomorrow bring fresh hopes! 






Saturday, January 2, 2016

Living in and coping with a dysfunctional family

January 3rd, 2015.

Didn't expect myself to put up another blog post so soon. 

Today, my mother went ballistic again. I did mention in my earlier blog posts that I live in a dysfunctional family and I'm not exaggerating. Oftentimes, people will say that you can choose how you react to certain situations and I'm somewhat comforted by the fact that I have a blog where I can freely let my thoughts flow. Better than nothing I guess. 

Growing up in an environment without love, I've always wondered how it's like to be in a family where everyone lives in peace and harmony. My mother has kinda been both the good and bad guy -- she is the one who holds the entire family together and she is also the one who, through her wild mood swings and insanity, broke the family up and strained all the relationships within this household. I have never really had a complete family -- and I crave for one. 

There were days I wish my parents were gone. I know this may sound terribly unfillial but when you live in an environment where the parents are constantly fighting (both verbally and physically) and you can't escape, you will find yourself wishing death upon 'em. You wanna set yourself free from the shackles of a highly negative environment, which is filled with screaming, shouting, fighting, cursing and tears. You don't want to be in a family where your mother is always praising your brothers and putting you down. You don't want to be discouraged by your mother telling you that you're ugly and good-for-nothing. 

This year, I resolve to move out of this house, to find a place which I can call my own. Will I succeed? How am I going to do it despite my lack of financial resources? Will there be a miracle? I don't know but I'm going to do my darn best to move to a place where I can finally find some peace of mind and be able to truly focus on what matters to me most. 

I can and will do it. 2016 is the year of action. 

Are you in a similar situation? Share in the comments section below. Writing out your thoughts helps. Hugs! 






Friday, January 1, 2016

Setting up my system for success in 2016
























Definitely getting older by the day. I can feel it. 

The past two years have been a roller coaster ride of sorts for me. I graduated with an MBA from a top U.S b-school and went on an insane hunt for a job. Humiliated, demoralized, defeated and almost died. I rose from the ashes to eventually land a decent job that doesn't pay as well as I thought it should. Well, better a job than nothing, right? Wrong but more on that later. 2014 was a challenging year on so many fronts -- personal, family and professional. At times, it seemed as though the world was collapsing just on me and me alone. I didn't know what to expect; I thought I would fall into depression. And to make things worse, I was broke and saddled with a huge debt (USD90,000) from my MBA education in the U.S. Tough like hell before 2015 came along...with a job in tow. I took that offer knowing that it wasn't particularly in line with what I was looking for but hey, it didn't turn out that bad. At the every least, it was a great startup that managed to get itself into mainstream media for all stories bad and good. I traveled the most ever with this job and managed to get some folks envious. Despite all of the job perks, I struggled with the pay, a dysfunctional family, a broken social life and a nagging worry about what's going to my future. 

Today's January 2nd, 2015 as I sat down to pen down my thoughts on what I see myself doing in the days to come. Over the holidays, I picked up Scott Adams's book on "How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big". Two big ideas stuck -- 1) Our job is not our job; our job really is to find a better job 2) One should always have a system instead of a goal because goal-oriented people exist in a state of nearly continuous failure that they hope will be temporary. I've never thought this way before. Simple but pretty revolutionary ideas. As I march on to the big 40, I want to put in a place a system that can hopefully make the years before hitting the 4-0 sweeter than those years before I turned 30. Here's my system:

1. Own my life and my time. By this I mean not giving a damn effing sh*t to what others think about what I do. I'm fully responsible for my own life and I can't let it go. The moment I do, others will take over and plan my day for me. Never  allow yourself to fall into this situation, ever. 

2. Don't be scared. I was born into a pretty poor and broken family. Everyone says that they are poor but really? Well, my dad brought me to the airport to ask for money from strangers when my family just couldn't afford the extra penny to be donated to my school; my brothers and I had to share a Filet-O-Fish burger from McDonald's because we couldn't afford to get one burger for each person; I was always wondering at the young age of 13 how I was going to pay for my school tuition. Was I really poor? You bet. I grew up introverted and scared of the world in general. But as I became older, I also realized that my fear holds me back and pushed me deeper into the dark recesses of poverty and destitution. I'd want fear to push me to achieve greater heights and down deeper and darker. I commit to myself to never be scared again. Break things. Speak up. Do it. 

3. Count my blessings. I may be dealt the life tree of lemons but I did manage to munch on some cherries that some lovely folks brought to me. Let' see -- I got a job (though I may not like it that much), the opportunity to travel (San Francisco, Chicago, Paris, Bali, Bangkok, Phuket, Berlin, Spain, London), meet with some really nice people and some spare change to buy my favorite sweets. 

4. Just say no. Mr Congeniality. Nay, this ain't even remotely close to a title like Mr. Universe. So why the heck do so many people want to be nice and agree to do things that simply suck the life outta of 'em? Saying yes to something you dislike or to someone you despise brings negative energy. Deep inside, you actually feel horrible for nodding to that request. Reclaim your dignity, say no and you will thank yourself for it. This year and the years forward, I'm going to be saying no a million times more often than yes. 

5. Travel and meet people. Hang around with like-minded people. If you want to be an entrepreneur, meet and mix around with entrepreneurs. Don't be a recluse. You're an introvert? So am I. But hey, if you're mixing with people who think like you, it's gonna be so much less intimidating to hang with folks who share a common passion. Want to transform your life? Want to change the world? Well, go meet with folks who have similar goals. You can be a sociable introvert -- and this is exactly what I wanna be. 

6. Career. I may be working for the best employer in the U.S., but hey, who's to say that I will be employed tomorrow when I wake up? And what about that USD90,000 loan? At the current rate, I'd be debt-free only when I hit 5-0. Holy cow! And if I am fired tomorrow? You get the point and this is why I love Scott Adams's idea that we should always be on the lookout for our next job. Your job is not your career unless you're madly in love with it that it reciprocates with money and even more future opportunities. So, make it your business to always be looking for a career that fires you up so much that you will never ever want to do anything else. It's only possible if you never stop looking. 

7. Fitness. The MBA program combined with the late-night binging and lack of exercise meant an accumulation of fats and a bulging tummy. I can't sit down these days without some loose fat hanging over my belt and that's just annoying and ugly. I may never be able to attain the chiseled abs and well defined bodies of models but I think if I aim high enough, I believe I can get there. I literally spent the last 14 days in beast mode and thoroughly enjoyed busting those fats at the gym and outside. Cardio never felt this good baby! I hit close to 100km -- and you know what, I am going to crosse the 10KM mark this evening. Being fit and leans helps me move faster and build confidence. What's there not to like? The motivation is there and I will never want to stop moving. 

8. Home. I have been sleeping on a floor mattress since the day I was born. I get a bed to myself only when I'm out traveling or overseas for work etc. How ironic this is. And you know what? I sleep in the living room. Absolutely no privacy. I feel like I could do so much more if I had a space to myself and this year, I wanna work my ass off to get the sh*t out of this  house. I want a space to call my own and do my own thing. Without a decent living space, it's just draining to have to deal with all the inconveniences that come with a shared room. Considering my low salary and high debt, this seems to be moonshot but that's also the reason for why I want to put this out here -- we hold each other accountable for our achievements. 

Writing this blog post today makes me feel a ton better and thanks for reading. Turning a year older and moving into 2016 ain't all that bad afterall. Perhaps you're in a similar quandary yourself and if so, do drop me a note -- let me know what's bothering you and how you plan to deal with it. 

Let's make each day count. Make your own opportunity and destiny. Own it. 

Saturday, August 2, 2014

Happy birthday, Mr. Start-Up

Today's my birthday.

I've never been in the mood to celebrate my birthday. My family doesn't care much about birthdays and I can't remember the last time we ever got to together to celebrate the birthday of anyone. Part of the reason was because we just weren't able to afford a birthday party, cake or anything fanciful when I was little. After I started work, things got slightly better but by then, we had already gotten used to the idea of not celebrating birthdays in the typical fashion -- the most that we would do to mark the birthday of anyone was to get some fried chicken. That was already a big step forward from what we used to have when I was little.

Today's slightly different. Nope, I still didn't celebrate my birthday but I actually did something different to mark this occasion. To begin with, my mood was somber -- I've got a negative prognosis on my future career. It wasn't exactly the kind of news one would want to receive on this day, but you know what, I can actually live with it. In fact, it got me thinking -- the more the world wants me to fail, the more I want to succeed; the more the world thinks that I can't make it, the more I want to win -- and to win big. 

With that thought, I decided to go for a 15-round run (3.75 miles) around the stadium track. Ever since I got home, my fitness level has plunged -- I got lazy and started to use age an excuse to cut back on the intensity and frequency of my exercise routine. The path ahead is long and uncertain; it is therefore even more important that I preserve my health for a long and arduous journey ahead. I don't want to surrender to life. I went to get my MBA because I didn't want to be who I was in the past. I wanted to be me; I aspired to become someone who can change the world. To achieve my dreams, good health is therefore paramount. And there is no better way to mark my birthday than to make a promise to myself that I will stay healthy and fit. A 15-round run - though not a personal best nor some record-breaking feat - was still an achievement.

I am currently enrolled in a technology entrepreneurship course at Stanford. This is my second attempt at taking this course and while I am up to my neck with full-time job applications, I decided that this is a great opportunity for me to meet kindred spirits and get my name out there...to show the world what I can do and to accomplish what I believe I can do. So I am immensely pleased that I thought of an idea that I could work on. It's all about the shared economy, which is a phrase coined to describe the new, connected world that we live in; one where people will pool resources together to benefit themselves, their community and even the world we all live in. I am not sure how to execute the idea yet (it involves some hardcore computer coding and I have little coding knowledge) but I am incredibly excited that I hatched the idea today -- on this day that is coincidentally my birthday.

Happy birthday, my new venture. May you grow up healthy, popular, strong and powerful.





Sunday, July 20, 2014

Bring out the child in you!

Many people lament about lost childhood, about wanting to go back to the carefree days of being a child. Of late, I have had the same feeling, which inexplicably becomes stronger with each passing day. I wanted to be a kid once more, to live the life of being a child, completely unsaddled by (or should I say ignorant to) society's expectations and by life's pressures; I wanted to be able to have unbridled freedom to do what I want, in things that truly interest me.



Wait, why have I lost my freedom and my ability to simply listen to my heart when I am supposedly wiser and more independent now as an adult? Have I also caved in to the need to conform and in the process, lost myself? These were the thoughts that lingered in my mind, and as I was searching for the answers, I discovered, to my aghast, that I was no longer the high-achieving top performer I used to be 23 years ago! I used to be among the best, if not, the best in my class; I was always producing top quality work and drawing praise (and an occasional look of envy) from people around me. However, as I critically examined my performance in my post-college years, I am grossly disappointed. Granted that I had occasional wins over my eight-year career, I have not had the kind of phenomenal success that I had as a child. So what did I do 23 years ago that enabled me to perform at my peak? 

1. Focus 
Growing up with a mother who knew the value of getting a good education, I led a pretty disciplined life as a child. I knew that I had to focus on my studies - and be insanely good at it. My family of five depended on my dad's monthly income of US$500 to get by and this meant that we couldn't afford life's luxuries, like computer games, musical instruments, and fancy athletic gears. On the positive side, this meant that I had no distractions. I was able to simply focus on my studies all day every day. Malcolm Gladwell in his book, "Outliers", mentioned that true mastery comes only after 10,000 hours of continuous, consistent practice. By focusing on my studies, I was able to accelerate the learning process and before I knew it, I had already spent more than 10,000 hours on my studies. No surprises that a poor kid like me could outperform children who came from a financially better background. 

2. Grit
I am never the smartest kid in the class and I never for once believe that I have the Einstein-genius type of genes in me. I may have a good college degree, and recently, an MBA but I am nowhere close to being an Einstein (or some would say, Tesla's Elon Musk). My parents had little education, and were never academically inclined. I was however able to achieve significant breakthroughs in school. I came out tops in my Arts & Craft, Math and Science classes. I had the second highest score in my elementary school. Why? Hardwork. Determination. Perseverance. Grit. I stayed up till midnight just so that I could do one more exercise (Check back on my previous blog post on the value of "Just one more"!), I woke up an hour early every morning before I went to school to review my work; I rushed home from school just so that I could finish up the assessment books -- and get another one from the bookstore. I literally busted my ass during those years just so that I could soar in school. 

3. The "Indiana Jones Adventurer"mindset
I was particularly good at Maths and had a flair for Arts and languages when I was in school. I could say all this in hindsight but I actually never knew that I had a knack for design though I was almost always able to produce amazing work in class. What I knew then was I enjoyed doing what I did. As a kid, I allowed my imagination to run wild and before I knew it, I was producing all kinds of fancy art pieces - calligraphy, wood sculpture, oil paintings, charcoal drawings. Nothing was too difficult for me. I had the adventurous spirit in me to explore and I completely gave myself free rein to create and build whatever I liked. Not good enough? "It's okay -- I can always redo another one." was my attitude. 

4. Be at war with the greatest enemy - myself
I was pretty good with languages but the Chinese Language (if you have taken it before) isn't exactly the easiest language to master in the world. The first thought that came to my mind, however, was not whether or not I would fail. Rather, I thought about what I could do to tackle the challenge and excel in class. I had a warrior mindset. I didn't take the easy way out by throwing in the towel; instead I threw down the gauntlet to my competitors and in making a tough commitment, I found the energy to seek out means and ways to improve my language skills. I vividly remember going through Chinese newspapers and copying down phrases after phrases of sentences and unique idioms in a book; I remember spending hours after hours going through newspaper articles to build up my Chinese vocabulary. Success begets success and I became so fired up and I was constantly challenging myself to be better. I was at war with myself. 

5. Immersed myself in a superior environment
Growing up in a neighborhood school meant that my classmates were not kids from elite backgrounds. I wasn't aware of anyone in class who had parents who drove fanciful cars (though this completely changed when I went to middle school). I was in a very supportive environment where we helped each other out and I prospered. I eventually did well enough to enrol in the country's best middle school and while I initially had a culture shock (me, a kid whose family earned enough to qualify for financial aid from the country vs others whose families were millionaires), I was actually fortunate enough to have friends who were better than me. I mixed around with the best of the best and I could occasionally get their help on school work. I had access to amazing resources in school and even if I weren't the top 10% in school, I would still rank among the top 10% in the country. 

Fast forward 23 years and I am now jobless and wondering what's next for me. I went from being a kid with no elitist background to attending the top middle school in the country and eventually graduating within the top 2% of my class in college...and now back to being a nobody. What happened? Why have I fallen from the sky? If life has any lessons for me, and if I do get a second chance at being a top performer, these are things that I absolutely need to fix:

1. Distractions
I simply lost my way. I became too caught up in the proverbial rat race. I succumbed to life's pressures and others' expectations of me (more on this in my earlier blog post on "How to Lead a Happy Life"). I spent time trying to do everything and ended up achieving nothing. I jumped at whatever is cool and hip and could help me become rich but in the process, lost myself and my focus. I cared too much about what others (parents, friends and business associates) would think of me and too little about what works best for me. I stopped being a master at my own game. 

2. A shrinking network
When you experience success, you will feel good about yourself and the confidence you gained will be a natural people's magnet. You will find yourself getting offers for jobs and people wanting to know you. You walk around with a glow on your face and a halo above your head; you radiate and glitter - and you grow as a person. As I jumped from one opportunity to another opportunity and continued to experience setbacks and misses, my confidence continued to get battered, day by day, year by year. I lost the confidence to go out and meet people...because I simply don't know what to say and how to behave. My network began to shrink and this created a vicious circle. I am no longer mixing with people who knew more than me, were smarter than me, or could bring me to greatness.

3. A fear of the unknown
I became too self conscious and ended up creating this hole that sucked my life in. While I still went ahead to get my MBA with no certainty of a bright future, I was still mired in a "scared-to-fail" mindset. I became suspicious of what lies ahead and began to doubt my abilities and skills. I have the experience, the skills and the results to take on the world's greatest problem but the fear of the unknown is pulling me back. I cared too much how others were better than me and underestimated my ability to be better than them. Fear cripples and destroys, like a subconscious devil that lurks in the dark recesses of your mind. It must be purged, without delay. 

Writing this blog post is cathartic. This is however a great first step in getting my life back on track and rising from the ashes of failure. It's really my own doing that I am where I am today and I accept it. But you know what, recognizing where I have gone wrong and knowing how I could regain success will get me up and running. Focus. Persevere. Push on. Reach out. I want to bring out the kid in me again -- and I will. 

What failures have you had in life? Are you still the child that you were many years? How have you successfully overcome life's challenges and handled the lemons that were thrown at you to get to where you are today? I'd love to hear from you. Share your thoughts in the comments section below!

Always remember, your career is a line and not a single point. 


Sunday, June 22, 2014

Four tips to leading an instantly happy life

I recently visited a tropical country in Asia and found that this city is filled with people who are unhappy. You don't see people smile; you hardly see people laugh; you rarely see people celebrate life. For a country that always tops the charts on various global business indices, you'd think that the success of the country would naturally percolate down to its people. The truth is anything but. In fact, according to the Happy Planet Index, this country ranks a miserable 90 out of 151 countries analyzed. Life ain't easy for a lot of people, but it sure has taken a toll on a good number of people who reside on this little sunny island. I wish they could be happier!

I am no happiness guru but I am sure those people in that country - and everywhere else - would benefit from the following four happiness tips. Results guaranteed, with no less than a smile of course!































1. Change your perspective
Life is all about how we look at certain issues. If you don't think so, take any unhappy problems you have now and reframe it; focus on the positive outcomes rather than the negative, look at the upside and not the downside. Once you look at your predicament through what I call the happiness lens, you'd actually be happy and weirdly thankful that you are in this situation.

I am unemployed and am out job hunting all day every day. I recently had my 6th round of interview with a consulting firm, and waited for more than a week, hoping that they would call with an offer...but no calls. I did not receive any rejection emails either. For people who have been through this process before, you'd know this feeling. So I decided to change the way I looked at this issue -- the longer the consulting firm took to come back to me with a decision, the more time I would have to look for another job, the higher the probability of me finding a job that would be a better fit with my aspirations! This thought was liberating, and it cheered me up instantly. I found renewed energy in my stride. And always remember, you lost a company that doesn't like you; the company lost someone who was in love with them? Who's the real loser here? The company, not you.

2. Do not compare
Life is hard but harder if you're always competing with others, either knowingly or unknowingly, with others. Facebook has made it worse by giving you news feeds at the most inopportune time -- a friend declaring she's got a great job offer in Seattle; another posting 101 photos of his vacation in Europe, all these while you're busy scouring the net for a job. The truth hurts - and this is nothing further from the truth. But things will miraculously change once you realize that all of us are unique and different, right from the day we were born. There are simply no benefits to comparing with others. Quit looking at and admiring the good fortune of your peers, and celebrate who you are today. Smile.

3. Be all in 
How often have we been blindsided by our own self-imposed unhappiness that we neglect to be "all in" in whatever we do? By allowing yourself to be mired in unhappiness, you're preventing yourself to give your all to the task at hand. Much has been said about the value of focus, and it is no different here. If you can't focus and dedicate yourself to what you do, you can never scale the peak of excellence; if you can't jettison your unhappiness, you are setting yourself up for mediocrity and greater failure. See the connection here? So give yourself and life another chance at every single thing you do and be "all in". Plus, there's always the bonus of a euphoric high from a job well done.
Need some help here? Try meditation to reclaim your mental focus. There's an app that I use called "Headspace" and I absolutely love it ! For more details, check it out here http://www.getsomeheadspace.com

4. Live your own life
Sometimes, we care too much about other people's view of us, and in the process, allow our perception of their views to guide our behavior. Between a 100-hour per week job that pays $20,000 a month and a 40-hour per week job that pays $7,000 a month, most people would likely go for the former since being rich and wealthy would buy you respect from people around you -- or so you think. Yes, while people may gossip about you, they often don't really care that much about you and what you do. If this is the case, then why should you allow your actions to be dictated by others would perceive you? Honor yourself, stake your claim to your life and do whatever you need to do to bring you happiness. You will soon find that there are just as many cheerleaders around you, too.

Hope you will find the above happiness tips useful. If you ever need help to change your view of the world, drop me a line. I'd also love to hear from you your secrets to happiness. Go ahead and share in the comments section below!

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Demystifying talent assessment centers - 4 reasons why they don't work

I'd be the first to admit that I enjoy reading HR and personal effectiveness books. In fact, I am reading the book by Richard Nelson Bolles, "What color is your parachute?" for the second time. However, when measuring the effectiveness of any person's professional capabilities, I'd seriously stop at engaging the help of a HR consultancy firm, especially those that purport to be able to assess the strengths and weaknesses of an individual within a day simply by putting them through their proprietary behavioral assessment programs.

DDI (Development Dimensions International) is one of the many HR consultancy firms in the market that offers talent assessment solutions. One of their better known programs is the one-day assessment center test that puts applicants through a role-play under what they would label as "stretched" and "stressful" conditions. I recently was selected to participate in the assessment center program as the last and final selection stage for the Global-Asia Management Program administered by the Economic Development Board of Singapore (more on this program in my next post). Despite being skeptical about the true effectiveness of such a method in assessing an individual's qualities, I went ahead to prepare for my actual day assessment by putting in the hours to review the materials which were e-mailed to me about five days in advance. I was assigned to take on the persona of Marty Kane, the Area Director for North American Operations of a fictitious company, Global Solutions, Inc. This company offers a whole slew of robotics solutions across diverse industries.

Having read and thought through the required materials beforehand, I was confident that I will be able to nail the challenge on the actual day -- I knew what to expect at the assessment center; I had several strategic frameworks all written out to help me tackle different business issues; I understood the criticality of certain issues and the urgency of getting them all resolved as Marty Kane. I was all ready to jump right into the exercise.

On that morning, I arrived at the assessment center to find five other candidates who had also been shortlisted by EDB to participate in this exercise. Most of them were all from very well-known b-schools -- London Business School, MIT Sloan, Stanford, Oxford Said. (While I was acutely aware of how elitist Singapore is, I was pleasantly surprised to find myself in the unique position of being an underdog, given the lower ranking of my b-school.) Interesting start to the day. We were then quickly ushered into a conference room and were briefed by an immaculately-attired DDI representative on the string of events to take place. Nothing I didn't already know.

Shortly, we were asked to take up our positions in the room. Each room was deliberately furnished to resemble an office, with a laptop and other stationery on the desk -- except that this room came equipped with a videocam that points at you and surreptitiously captures every single movement of yours. I felt my privacy being intruded upon and felt at that instant, like a guinea pig about to be operated on in a science laboratory. Seriously, would any companies that treat their staff with integrity want to even allow them to be continually filmed for seven hours, all in the name of talent assessment? I  frowned and quickly realized that my expression could have been recorded. I cast aside that thought and quickly got down to work.

I began to feel very uncomfortable and started to perspire profusely as I worked on my e-mails. No, not that the e-mails were intimidating, but it was simply the room -- there was little ventilation. I was in my executive jacket (hey, there were points for executive presence!), and the heat and humidity got the better of me. I refrained from wiping my perspiration thinking that this would portray me poorly but this didn't last long. Twenty minutes into the session, I decided to let go (screw those executive presence points) and just be myself. Which chief executive in the world would not perspire when it's hot? This thought sent me free, and I gained the momentum to tackle the e-mails as they came in.

Like what I had expected, there were about six e-mails sitting in my in-tray awaiting resolution. As the Area Director who was on the job on his first day, the number of e-mails sure made things seem urgent.  I wondered to myself, how realistic is it for an person - regardless of designation - to be asked to look into critical issues on his/her first work day? Would any CEO worth their salt entrust a new director to handle a public relations fiasco that has severe repercussions on the share price of the company? Grudgingly, I went through all the e-mails and began to plan my day on how and which issues to work on first. Since my business plan presentation was after lunch, I reckoned that I'd be able to power through my business plan presentation during my lunch hours. I could then use the remaining time to focus on other outstanding issues.

The issues were plenty and ranged from HR issues (I needed to teach someone to coach a recalcitrant employee who used to be a star performer. How did that person even become a manager without knowing how to coach a subordinate?), to operational issues to power struggles (yes, another director obviously was already unhappy with Marty Kane, even before she had joined the company. What a b****). I paused for a minute and recalled the things that didn't work and leadership behaviors I loathed when I was working. I decided that if I were to be a leader, I would have to take a position on certain issues (especially since DDI had made the cases urgent by emphasizing that I would only have one day to handle all issues and would be uncontactable thereafter). I had to be very focused and clear in my communications -- and used this approach to tackle the issues as they came.

The e-mails - unsurprisingly - came in fast and furious and before I knew it, it was lunch time and I had to start working through my business plan presentation. I wanted to impress by inserting a graph but decided that I'd be better off using that time to craft my message. My overarching goal was to impress my supervisor within 15 minutes and get his backing for my proposal. I broke down my presentation to several key areas -- Market Analysis; Marketing Strategy; Financials; Operations; Execution Plan; Potential Risks. I was quite pleased that I had comprehensively formulated the problem (my b-school professor would be proud of me) and came up with a set of slides that touched on the key areas; I was equally excited to be making a presentation too. After one round of rehearsal, I was ready to welcome my assessor -- a snobbish lady who was to do the role-play with me. The entire presentation lasted for half an hour and the assessor asked some questions pertaining to my slides and at one point, I was a little taken aback when she asked questions on areas which I had already covered extensively in my presentation. (Maybe she was thinking about her lunch, I reckoned.) She also fired away some questions which she had prepared beforehand, which were not presentation-specific. While it wasn't a nerve-wrecking experience (trust me, hosting a dinner is more a million times scarier than this), I wasn't in the best of mood. Again, my attempt to show my enthusiasm during the presentation had only made me perspire even more profusely! I tried to maintain my composure and put on a grin, despite beads of perspiration running down my cheeks. Gosh, what is wrong with the ventilation of the building? I almost wanted to scream to literally let off some steam. But seeing the voice recorder (yes, they record every single thing about you) on the table, I stifled my scream and soldiered on.

After the business plan presentation, it was back to my e-mails - and more e-mails. At some point, I began to even laugh at how ludicrous the scenarios were. This ironically helped me relax and I actually felt good typing out my responses to each of those e-mails, even proffering advice based on what my real-life work experience. My day abruptly ended with an interview, with the same snobbish lady whom I met earlier. She started off asking me questions pertaining to how I went about organizing my day, who I would actively engage in the company, which issues were deemed most important to me (I could hardly remember all the issues and the names of everyone involved and I naturally fumbled to come up with a response. I quietly suspected that this question was more a test of my memory than anything else), before moving on to questions about how I have handled certain situations throughout my career. Honestly, I was surprised and irked when she started asking me those questions, many of which had already been asked twice in a video and a phone interview I have already had prior to coming to the assessment center. The feeling was akin to being in an operationally defunct hospital, with a patient having to answer the same questions asked by three different doctors. They probably have never heard of resource streamlining and optimization.

Next, I was moved to a conference room where I met up with the other shortlisted candidates. I was late by about 10 minutes (due to the interview) and I went in not knowing what to do. I quickly reorganized myself and realized that we had to - as a team - come up with some suggestions to the problems that the fictitious company was facing. It was interesting to see how different people behaved in a group setting, especially with an alpha male candidate clearly dominating the discussion. Different people had different opinions and I could not see the discussion converging. What a déjà-vu scene! I thought I should chip in and get everyone back on track -- and thought I did well by not dominating the discussion though the team failed to achieve any consensus at the end of the discussion. There were some DDI assessors in the room too, and we were judged for how we behaved and what we said during that 20 odd minutes.

The day soon ended and I was exhausted from all the perspiration. Mentally, it was not as challenging as I thought it would be -- well, it was all fictitious and there was nothing to stop me from coming up with out-of-the-box "solutions" since there was simply no way to assess whether that solution would be effective or otherwise. I was relieved that I could remove my jacket and breathe easy, and actually motivated by my interactions with those applicants from the better schools. This vindicated my view that students should not be judged solely based on the prestige of their schools. A great confidence booster !

About two weeks later, I heard back from the Global-Asia Management Program administrator -- I was rejected. Oh dang. What did I do wrong at the assessment center? I quickly fixed an appointment to speak with a senior consultant from DDI to get a better sense of how I was assessed. Surely, if I had successfully advanced to the final selection round only to flub it, the assessment center must have given me nothing but a less-than-favorable report? I couldn't wait to hear it from DDI -- and grill them on their methodology.

A senior consultant prefaced the feedback with several caveats. According to him, the results of the assessment were based the collective efforts of three DDI staff, with one reviewing e-mails and others giving their feedback based on what they saw and heard throughout the day. While there was a list of attributes that they checked against, I was only briefed on two key strengths and two key weaknesses. I received praise for being task-oriented (the evidence being that I was very clear in my instructions and in my e-mails. Yes, I have achieved my goal to avoid bad writing and dishing out nebulous instructions) and for being someone who is not afraid of taking on challenges and new responsibilities. I displayed a strong go-getter character and showed courage at tackling various tasks and was adamant in resolving them. (Perfect observation that matches my goal to be an enterprising innovation chief!). He also said that I was very analytical and could make great business analysis and judgement and was adept at making sense of large data sets. So what went wrong?

Going on to what DDI called "developmental areas" (a euphemism for weakness), I was told that I could do much more to "involve others in areas where I am able to ensure mutual outcomes"; I should also consider ways to better enhance my ability to "lead people to change". Wait, what was he saying again? And so he explained that I was authoritative (excuse me, isn't this how a leader should be like given the criticality of the situation?) and was not as effective as they would like me to be when engaging others to come up with mutually beneficial outcomes. He then went on to clarify that by "leading people to change", he meant that I was being prescriptive to only my staff. (I have a big issue with this -- why be so pompous as to string together power corporate words like "lead", "people", "change" when all they meant I was being prescriptive to my staff? This makes no sense.) I clarified that I reacted according to the circumstances of the case, based on my interpretation of the instructions given. I was bemused when he added that I had great people skills and was a strong communicator. Does this point not conflict with their observations of me being authoritative and prescriptive? Was there a misinterpretation somewhere? While I may seem like I am resisting negative feedback here, I would like to add that feedback given should be consistent and clear and supported with right evidence and observations. All they could be quote was an example through their 20-minute long observation and several "themes" they drew by reading my e-mails. Pathetic. Where's the robustness in their assessment?

My experience shows that HR consultancy companies that charge a few grands to allegedly provide a systematic solution to gauge staff potential are not worth their salt. It's all an exercise in futility and an utter waste of precious resources for all involved. Unless those companies could address the following issues, you - and your company - would do better to think twice before using an assessment center to evaluate your future hires.

1. Unrealistic. Each candidate is put through situations that purportedly resembles real-life situation. But really? Which company would put a new hire on the frontline on their first workday? Is a seven-hour assessment, based on the arbitrary evaluation by three strangers for a short time period enough to accurately gauge the qualities and effectiveness of a person? Is disallowing all forms of communications - except e-mails - representative of the modern, highly connected world? Are e-mails even a good proxy of someone's interpersonal skills? Is a short 20-minute discussion any effective at determining how someone performs at work? If not, how does DDI even achieves its goals to help companies "reduce hiring mistakes"? Given that behaviors are better assessed over an extended period of time, how does a short seven-hour assessment be any more reliable than a manager's evaluation of someone's performance and behavior over the course of, say, a year or several years? Would past performance not be a better indicator of future performance than the results from a make-believe environment that is anything but representative of the real world?

2. Inaccurate. There has been a lot of research done on how e-mails could give rise to misunderstanding. Surprisingly, this point was lost on DDI when one of their main judging criteria was e-mails. The assessors were looking out for "key themes" and a balance of several qualities in the e-mails candidates sent. Hardly anything was said about the content and quality of the ideas in the e-mails. If e-mails were the least effective way to resolve any HR issues, then why is a HR company using e-mails as a way to judge how a candidate would potentially interact with other people in the future? I find it incredulous that after all these years when I was lauded for my ability to lead teams to deliver solids results, I was sadly evaluated - based on eight e-mails I sent - for being unable to "lead people to change". Seriously, DDI?

3. Ambiguous. I thought there is a structured way to finally measure a person's professional abilities. This turned out to be a huge disappointment. The entire assessment center evaluation was based on the subjective perceptions and interpretation of three strangers. How much experience do those assessors have in working with top executives who run for-profit organizations? Are they the best person to partner any organizations in making hiring decisions, knowing that those companies are going to place a high emphasis on the outcome of their evaluation? Why did DDI - a company that has been around for 40 odd years - not even think of coming up with a scale to assess how strong or weak each quality is? Just like a strength can be a weak strength, a weakness can also be recessive. Definitely ample room for improvement here. The ambiguity of the evaluation methodology is a huge flaw.

4. Biased. One key bugbear many employees have is how biased a performance review process can be; in a similar vein, it is often hard to isolate the biasedness that recruiters tend to have when interviewing a candidate. While the process of putting candidates through a screening process like an assessment center may seem at first glance a way to finally overcome those biases, my recent experience showed that it is nothing revolutionary. Given that the assessment remains a highly subjective exercise by three other people who have their biases, prejudices, personalities, likes and dislikes, how is anyone to be certain that the results are reliable and free from biases? If not, how does it overcome those biases? Who's to say that there will be no evaluator who will dominate the discussion and drive the outcome of the final report based on his/her preconception? If the results are likely to be flawed, how then does it justify the integrity of its evaluation of any one person?

Such assessment centers may help complement the results of a manager's evaluation, since the manager has the advantage of already assessing their staff prior to receiving the results from the assessment center. (Still, any effective managers should trust their own judgements of their own staff rather than entrust the fate of their staff to a team of highly-paid strangers.) However, given how much these companies charge, and the attendant shortcomings of the entire process, I'm bemused why companies are willing to fork out huge sums of money to make hiring decisions, which if wrongly executed, will have a detrimental impact on a company's future strategic growth. Until such a time when the process could be made objective, assessment centers lack the credibility they need to develop into an accurate talent measurement resource.